Many in retirement are travelling comfortably, with three key factors contributing to their happiness – good physical and mental health and enough money to enjoy life.
Perhaps the assumption that markets are still anchored by predictable economic policies needs to be challenged. For the first time since the fall of the Berlin Wall, political volatility – once background noise – is potentially reshaping investment risk at a structural level.
Retirement is a time to brush up on those conversational skills
Retirement is your gift of time, an opportunity to reflect on yourself and your relationships beyond the noise, distraction and hurly-burly of work. Here is a way to use that gift – think about the conversations you have with friends and family now you’re retired, and time is no longer your master.
Another point is worth making. It’s possible that many of your pre-retirement conversations happened at work, in which case you may need to find new people to talk to, as well as topics to discuss, in retirement. All this suggests that it may be timely to review your conversational skills on retirement.
So, are you satisfied with your conversational skills? Do you think improvement is possible? If your answer is “yes” and “no” then read no further. But if you are curious about enriching these interactions then let’s explore what makes conversations meaningful.
A good starting point is the Oxford English Dictionary, where we read that a conversation is the “interchange of thoughts and words”.
Obviously, there are words and thoughts in any conversation, so there isn’t much more to add. There remains that strange word “interchange”, which I call the back and forth of conversation. To better understand what this means, let’s examine the different types of conversations retirees often engage in.
Here is a preliminary list that is by no means meant to be exhaustive.
Catch-up between long-time friends: I recently had the good fortune to casually overhear a conversation between two men, probably in their 70s, that consisted of an interchange of recollections. As far as I could tell their two hours together centred on the topics of rowing and camping in the countryside. Everything said related to their deep past that obviously brought back fond memories.
Boasting: This is a conversational mode in which the achievements of brilliant grandchildren, and, to a lesser extent children, are catalogued and recited in depth. While pride is natural, these conversations can sometimes feel more like recitals than dialogues.
Anecdotes: We all tell anecdotes. The aim is typically to amuse rather than inform. The atmosphere of anecdotes often becomes competitive. Who can tell the best anecdote, a competition probably better suited to actors and professional comedians than ordinary folks.
Grievances: This is a biggie. Eavesdrop on any conversation in public, on the bus, in a café or in the street and you’re guaranteed to hear one. Often you hear words and phrases such as, “you’ll never guess what she said next”, or “how dare they, it’s too much”. Usually, the grievance is a story that masks a deeper discontent, and wouldn’t you like to know what that is?
Technical: These usually convey information, say about politics. However, when you hear them, they are often someone else’s opinion from a newspaper or TV served up as if they are original insights.
Having a laugh: Isn’t it fun when you chat with friends where the aim is to generate laughs? These can be the most rewarding conversations.
Adding spice: You could try to freshen-up the conversation with some inspiring questions. For example, by asking people to name a character trait they wish they could acquire, and another they would love to jettison. This invites spontaneity and self-reflection, making the conversation more engaging.
Emotional interchange: Small talk has its place, but sometimes you want to go deep with friends. This provides a space in which to share struggles, frustrations and personal growth. Supporting a friend through life’s challenges can create stronger, more meaningful connections.
Conclusion: Do your conversations bring you true satisfaction? Of course, not every exchange will be life-changing, but it’s worth reflecting on your interactions from time to time. Ask yourself:
• Did I walk away having learned something new?
• Was I more passive than I wanted?
• Did our conversation focus on the future rather than just nostalgia?
Retirement offers the freedom to engage in richer, more fulfilling conversations. Why not take up the opportunity?
